17. Ave Maria

 Now I am sure you are wondering why in the hell is he writing about Ave Maria? I will go ahead and tell you. First, it is one of the most beautiful pieces of music of all time. Simple piano and usually it is sung by people with unbelievably beautiful voices. I don't know what they are singing, but I don't have to know to know it is beautiful.  Morgan Freeman's character in Shawshank Redemption said it best. "I have no idea to this day what those two Italian ladies were singing about. Truth is, I don’t want to know. Some things are best left unsaid. I’d like to think they were singing about something so beautiful, it can’t be expressed in words, and makes your heart ache because of it." 

The other reason I chose to write about this song is because I will never forget it being played and sung at my grandmother's funeral when I was 12. She passed far too young due to a long battle with cancer, but despite her battle she was always there for my sister and I. She, along with my other grandma who is still thankfully with us and is amazing all her own, would watch us when we were kids.  I was young then so I didn't fully understand the depths of a cancer battle. I don't really remember a whole lot of details, but I remember a few. I remember learning of her diagnosis, I remember her wig. I remember her being too sick to watch us due to treatments, I remember mentions of white counts and remission. I remember when the cancer came back. I remember a few days before she died she was driving my sister and I around to rent video games. The two of us oblivious, as kids often are, at the time to the pain she must have been feeling. My parents would later tell us that she was where she wanted to be and to not feel bad about asking her for a ride.   I remember when my dad got the call from the hospital the night she died. I remember the funeral and the roses for each year my grandparents were married and I remember this song. 

The beauty of the song gave me hope that her suffering was over and that if there is a heaven she would be there seeing all the things she missed. Now at times I lose my faith and wonder how, in a world so filled with pain and evil, there could be anything like heaven, but when I hear the notes of this song and soaring voices that could only come from something we don't understand my hope returns, as do the great memories I have of times with my grandma. 

 #RIP #AveMaria #grandma